Do I Have Mommy Brain or is This Just Boring?

I’m no longer sure I know the difference. I’ll pick up a book that people are raving about, read a few pages and put it down. Do I just not like the book? Do I disagree with all the hype? Or have my kids just taken any cleverness I used to have along with uninterrupted sleep and time to myself?
It’s hard not to second guess myself. Maybe I should like this book. Maybe I’m just not trying hard enough.
But I just don’t want to read it.
Similar things occur in other areas of my life too. Sometimes just having a conversation can seem like more than I can handle. I can be desperately trying to pay attention to what someone is saying and before I know it, my mind has wandered and I have no idea what the person I am talking to just said. It’s making me have a lot of empathy for people with attentional difficulties. It’s not that my mind wandering hasn’t been a problem before, but it’s never been so pervasive or felt so out of my control.
So do I really have mommy brain? Before my kids, I used to be able to pay attention to things even if I didn’t find them inherently interesting. I’d consider myself smart even. And I do feel like I’ve lost some of that, but I’m pretty sure my kids are only indirectly responsible.

Reasons Why My Brain is Sludge

1. Lack of good sleep
Now that Gordie (3.5 years) has stopped napping I’m finding it even harder to catch up when I lose sleep. Sleeping in is not something I even understand the meaning of any more and I find it hard to go to bed as early as I should and forego the small amount of kid free time I get in the evenings.
2. Lack of uninterrupted time
It’s hard to concentrate on anything when your kids are taking half of your attention or when they are interrupting what you’re doing every five minutes. I hardly do anything without it being frequently interrupted, including simple things like folding a basket of laundry.
3. I just don’t care anymore
This one I don’t think is going to change with time. I read because it makes me happy. I love to read. I don’t have time to read a book that I’m not enjoying. I don’t feel the need to prove that I can read complicated books. I know I can, I’ve done it. And if I’m enjoying reading Young Adult novels right now, so what. They are fast paced, and gripping and I can read them in little snippets of time I have available with ease.
I definitely hope I regain the ability to have a have a conversation without my mind drifting. But as for the books, I’m not so sure. I may not be at my best, and that book may be great, but I reserve the right to decide it’s boring anyway.

Dead Simple Suppers: Indian Spiced Beans and Spinach

I love the combination of beans and tomatoes. I especially love recipes like this one, where I can have all the ingredients I need just waiting in the cupboard (and freezer) for a day when I’ve forgotten to plan dinner. You can use this as the main dish by adding a bun or some rice to the side – it would also be nice on top of some pasta or couscous. Or you can make it a nutritious side dish instead and serve it with sausage or chicken.

Indian Spiced Beans and Spinach

(adapted from Rachel Ray Magazine)

Ingredients

• 1 Tbsp canola oil
• 1 onion chopped
• 1 large can of diced tomatoes (28 oz)
• 3 tsp ground coriander
• 1.5 tsp ground cumin
• 1/4 tsp garam masala
• 1/4 tsp tumeric
• 1 can of beans rinsed and drained (the original recipe called for chickpeas, I used navy beans)
• salt
• 1 package of chopped frozen spinach

Directions

1. Heat the oil in a large skillet over medium high heat.
2. Add chopped onion and cook for a few until slightly browned on the edges.
3. Add the spices, and tomatoes and frozen spinach. Cook until spinach is almost completely thawed. (If using chickpeas you can add them now too as they are more robust than navy beans).
4. Add beans and cook until heated through.

We’re Doing Really Well and Other Lies

(I wrote this just after I had Nicole, but only managed to actually publish it today – 3 months later)

Okay, so it’s not a lie exactly. Our baby Nicole was born last week (8 lbs 10 oz) and we’re now settling in at home. We are both healthy and happy and doing really well. But it sure leaves out a lot of details and makes things sound a lot better than they really are. I think sometimes lies like these can really hurt other women. When you are in the same situation, you compare yourself to your friends and don’t seem to measure up. But you’re not comparing yourself to their reality, just what you see, just what they show you. Even when things are going really well with your new baby, things are still hard.

Lie #1. We’re happy to be home and are doing really well.

What this really means: I’m really hormonal and burst into tears at the drop of a hat.Seriously, someone tells me that my son is doing well at Grandma’s and doesn’t seem to miss me – tears. Someone tells me that he misses me and wants his mommy –tears. I can’t even remember all the things that have made me cry this past week. It is getting better. Yesterday it was only a few times, but writing this paragraph has made me cry too.

My body is sore and fatigued. I feel worn out just from making dinner. Not even cooking anything spectacular – I carved a rotisserie chicken, spooned out a couple salads and warmed up some beans and tomatoes and was exhausted. Nicole was born via c-section – my stomach hurts. It’s generally controlled with advil and tylenol but it’s still tender and uncomfortable.

I’m tired.

Lie # 2. She’s nursing really well.

This is also true. She’s been latching like a pro from the start. Honestly, I don’t know if it was possible for it to go better. But it still sometimes hurts just from the power of her suck. A couple times one of my nipples bled a bit from where she shifted and chomped down too close. Sometimes I have to re-latch her a couple times to get in a good position. Sometimes it hurts just because my breasts are really full. Even when it’s going really, really well, doesn’t mean it’s easy.

There are more lies like this that I could talk about. But honestly, I’m just too tired to write any more. But things are going really well, really.

Did you de-emphasize your difficulties after having a baby? Did it seem harder for you than it did for everyone else?

Dead Simple Supper: Salsa Pasta Salad

Now that I have two kids, I’m finding it even more difficult to get a healthy dinner on the table. When I’m sleep deprived, I lack both imagination and enthusiasm in the kitchen. On top of this both my kids are having problems with milk and many of my go to easy meals rely on cheese.To assist me in avoiding takeout and providing my family with nutritious meals without a lot of effort, I’ve decided to blog about some dead simple suppers to help give me inspiration while meal planning or (more likely) while trying to figure out what on earth we’re going to have for supper tonight.

Salsa Pasta Salad Recipe

Ingredients

• 1 package of macaroni or other whole wheat noodles
• 1/4 of a small precooked ham cubed
• 2 bell peppers (any color) chopped
• 1 cucumber chopped
• handful of frozen peas
• Salsa

“Directions”

1. Cook pasta until al dente and cool under cold water.
2. Put in a large bowl along with vegetables and ham (the peas can go in frozen).
3. Add salsa just to coat and mix well. Add salt and pepper to taste.
4. Serve cold or room temperature.

If you're feeling more ambitious, try this pasta salad recipe from my friend Heather's blog. It's perfect for the summer when you're looking for something light that doesn't require a lot of cooking.

Things That Drive Me Bonkers: Is She a Good Baby?

When people ask “Is she a good baby”, I think most of the time they are just being conversational and not really thinking about what they are saying. But really, it’s just not a very good question to ask parents.

Sure some babies are easier than others: some sleep better, cry less, are content more. That seems to be what people are getting at when they are asking the question. But it seems to implies that babies that have more difficulty, are bad babies. And there are no bad babies. Some babies do struggle more in the early stages of life, they cry a lot, they sleep like garbage, they find life pretty darn distressing. They don’t have an easy time, and neither do their parents. So why do people want to push this in their face?

My son was a terrible sleeper and I hated it when people asked me that question. Seriously what was I supposed to say? “No. he’s not. He’s kind of crap. I’m thinking of sending him back”? Instead, I’d usually say something like “yes, he’s a good baby. Not a great sleeper, but he’s a good baby.”

I had kind of forgotten about this until I had my daughter. People still ask this question all the time. For a small baby, she is a pretty good sleeper, she is pretty content and she doesn’t cry much. Overall, she’s been a pretty easy baby. But I refuse to support people in suggesting that defines whether she is a good baby. Because all babies are good, they are doing the best they can to deal with the world. What else can you expect of them? They are babies! So I tell people that “She’s a pretty easy baby.” And she is. But both my kids were really good babies.

Did you get this question with your babies? How did you handle it?.

Calgary Zoo–Canadian Wilds Bingo Free Printable

My friend and I were thinking for an activity for our kids to do while they were at the Calgary Zoo. I couldn’t find what I was looking for, so I decided to make something myself.

I made up 5 different zoo bingo cards using Animals found in the Canadian Wilds area. We were also having an orange day (wear orange clothes, eat orange things etc) so that’s why the middle square is orange. We had the kids each find something orange for that ‘free play’ square. We gave each of the kids one of the cards and when they found one of the animals on their card they got a sticker to put on it.

The kids aged 2-5 had a really good time so I thought I’d share the cards I made so other people could use them too.

You can find a free 5 card zoo bingo card printable here.

Construction Site Birthday Cake

 

My little boy is now three. Where did the time go? I wanted to make him a special cake, but I have no real cake decorating ability (or any patience to try acquire it). I a cake similar to this one in a picture on pinterest but unfortunately the photo didn’t link anywhere :( Gordie told me that the best part of his birthday was the machines from the cake. It was definitely a hit!

I used a basic butter cream icing with peanut butter but any kind would do. I put it on the cake before it had finished cooling so that’s why it’s a little bit melty.

I found the machines at Walmart, they’re Matchbox brand and were only a little over a dollar each.

I used skor bits, chocolate chips and peanut butter chips.For the piles of dirt and rocks. I was thinking some kind of crushed up cookies or oreo crumbs would be great too.